I live in a family of 3 + 1 I lay down on the floor for days at end Staring at the chandelier The light like sun in my eyes Patches of black, blindness Every possibility of a dream Blinked away in seconds My family tips around my body Put the Christmas tree near her right leg The sofa close to her head My body now a landmark The chair too close to my chest It’s legs, 4 open invitations to new a life Lights hung around me Like an outline of my body My mother points to me Explains the guest how I used to be A celebration of a child that’s dead People come and go, look at the body at display. A tight lock on the glass around me I let the visitors gawk In a museum of misery, flight I’m the centre display Failing, fading I stay A distraction everyone unbothered by now Like a spot on the tile that was never fixed My carcass lays beneath my family Unfixed, broken, forgotten I look at my sun, eyes wide open I blink once, then more Every morning my dad drops a paper placard close to me “Happy family of 3 + 1”